Anyone else like to jerk off? I do, a LOT! I was walking down the street yesterday and a hot girl passed by, immediately my mind switched to sex mode. I started to pick up my pace, not to catch up with her, but to get back to my apartment so I could beat it. Then I thought about it, what’s my hurry? When I get back I could hop online and see any number of ladies doing any number of nasty things. Shit, if I wanted to I could have stopped right there in the street, pulled out my blackberry, and had some kinky Latina’s brown eye starring me in the face. These days you can choke your shit anywhere you get reception.
Do you remember what it used to be like to flog the dolphin mid 90’s? I used to sit at my parents computer for 2 hours trying to download some matures muff. By the time the pic popped up I had forgotten what I was doing. While that was annoying, I think we can all agree that whacking off has gotten too easy son! DSL and high resolution computer screens have killed the art of making love to yourself. That’s why I am starting a movement; from now on I will only use the lost art of mental masturbation. Think about it, there is an infinite supply of porn files downloaded on the hard drive of your mind. Every chick you have ever known has been stored up there, ready to be tea bagged at a moments notice. That is the best part, unlike my macbook here, my mind allows me to put any chick I have ever seen, in any situation, any position, any outfit, and in any location I see fit in order to bust a nut. This morning I gang banged the 5 hottest chicks I went to high school with in the girls locker room shower. This afternoon Alesha Keys sucked me off while she played piano. And tonight I am planning on hate fucking the shit out of Sarah Palin and then cumming on those glasses she is always wearing. The possibilities are endless, and the rewards far greater, when you start practicing the art of mental masturbation. Join me, because when its 5 against 1, everyone wins.
3 comments:
Wait a minute, I don't get it. How was she sucking you off while she was palying the piano. Were you stradling her on the piano bench? Were you stiing on the music stand? Don't worrry, I'm not going to steal your fantasy. I'm just curious.
You raise an interesting point. One side effect of the information age may be an erosion in the imagination ability of teenage boys and men. Someboday should do a study.
Yes, I sit up on the piano while she is on the bench. Then she tickles the keys around my legs, while also slobbing my knob. Since her mouth is full, I hit the high notes.
I have no doubt that my grandpa could produce clearer mental images of naked dames than I can. And by the time my grandkids come around, they won't even be able to imagine a naked chick if she was just in front of them. The imagination is in danger, and nowhere is this epidemic more evident than in the perverted minds of the male population, especially young male minds. Someone needs to step in and save the youth before its too late for them to mentally masturbate. Reading Rainbow is the only way to help.
-slow stickin handgina
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